Give me a break!!

When Mariah and Brinlee were little;

I used to take them

EveryWhere.

I did not let their nap times or feeding schedules

keep me from taking the world (and/or the mall) by storm.

Even when Asia the whirlwind came along;

I would still take them everywhere that I needed to go; even 

though it was slightly overwhelming, at first,

to have more kids than hands to hold onto them.

I had never been able to understand

those moms who wouldn't take their kids anywhere;

especially if it interfered with naptime

(heaven forbid)!
Even when Tatum joined our circus;

I forged ahead with my double stroller at

Pearlridge Mall and the Waikele Outlets

(our 2 favorite places to wander at!) and they knew

those malls like the backs of their hands!

Once Roxelle stepped onto the scene;

the 3 oldest were in school and

I was back down to having only 2 in tow again.

And they were

SO easy

to take along!  

I even took them with me to the elementary school

several times a week to volunteer and all the teachers

and staff knew us as well as the regular students!!

Then Grant came.

Poor little boy gets the shaft!  

Almost from birth he had debilitating skin rashes. 

This made it so hard to take him places with a raging skin problem.  

He required so much care and treatment.  

Then at 6 mos, we found out he is allergic to peanuts and eggs.

I was terrified of him sitting in a cart where

some other kid could have been eating a

peanut butter sandwich

or peanut butter cookies

or even a Snickers bar.  

So I chose to leave him home.

His birth was simultaneous to Will accepting

his current position in the ICU doing the night shift.  

This has afforded me the opportunity to

be able to leave Grant home.

I knew I could put him down for a nap

with the baby monitor in by Will and have a good 90-120 minutes

at the store before he would wake up.

Will has always been so fantastic

about stepping up and letting me have time to run errands by myself;

even when he may have worked 3-5 nights in a row (sometimes 6!!)

I have spent the last 2+ years loving

being able run errands

without

a diaper bag, snacks, toys and blankies in tow.

I will not feel guilty

for enjoying even an hour at the grocery store

or a couple of hours at the mall by myself or with a friend.

If this is what it takes to save my sanity

so that I can be present for my

6 children

when I am at home;

then so be it!  

Give me a break.

Literally. 

I need it and I deserve it!!