we decided that we were ready to start thinking about adding to our family. I went to the doctor to talk to her about how long it took to get pregnant with Roxelle and possible options that we have if this one starts to take as long.
(Yes, I am VERY impatient! HA HA)
I was already frustrated and called the doctor to get some advice. She decided that I should try the fertility drug Clomid. I did 3 rounds of that, to no avail.
At this point, I was tired of hanging in limbo. I wanted to lose some weight, but didn't want to
"go to the trouble"
if I was going to be pregnant anyway.
Thanksgiving Day I started my cycle AGAIN and was really frustrated. I knew that we were 5 weeks away from a trip to HI, which meant I was going to be in a swimming suit with about 15 extra lbs still hanging on.
The Monday after Thanksgiving, I decided to try a 7 day free trial at 24 Hour Fitness that somehow turned into a 3 week free trial and I ended up losing 11 lbs before Christmas! I was happy to be on the road to better health and that I'd look decent on the beach,
but still longing for another baby.
- During the last couple of days of our trip to HI, I got that un-friendly cycle again.
I was SO sad.
When we got home from our trip, I told Will that if
I am not pregnant this next time around, I was going to
pay for a gym membership,
lose that last 5-8 pounds,
and be done trying.
I kept "asking" Roxelle if she was going to be "the baby" forever. I decided in my head that we must be done. I didn't want to get any older. My body has endured 5 1/4 pregnancies already and it's telling me
I was laying in bed one night in mid January after the girls had gone to bed and before Will had gotten home. I was upset that I couldn't just have my way and be pregnant already. I told myself, that's IT! I am done! I don't want to hang in limbo anymore. I don't want to face another month of disappointment. I want to take my body back. I was laying there lamenting and feeling sorry for myself, when as clear as if someone standing next to me I heard
"Just be patient....."
It took me aback.
I wasn't sure if I'd just imagined it. I have never had anything that poignant happen to me before. I was sure I had made it up, until I realized that I hadn't and that I was being selfish and spoiled and just plain un-grateful for the beautiful daughters that I already do have and the good fortune I have already had in my previous pregnancies. I knew that Heavely Father wanted me to know that it would happen, but that I needed to be patient and wait until He says the time is right.
A little less than 1 month later, this is what I discovered....
I dropped to my knees in prayer to thank Heavenly Father for this wonderful blessing and I immediately took that picture with my phone and texted it to Will. He was elated! We decided to wait just a little while to tell anyone, to make sure that everything was ok.
I had my first official appointment today and everything looks GREAT! I am due on
October, 12, 2010
(but I am totally shooting for 10-10-10!!! LOL)
In case you're wondering, we'd be thrilled with a
but it would almost be a relief to have another girl. I'd hate to have to start completely over with our last baby and, YES, this is our last. :)